Steve Frey
John was on our JV football team. I was a first-year teacher and a first-year head football coach. John was also a student in one of my classes.
On the football field, he was a reserve running back. He always tried his hardest and would do anything asked of him. He wasn’t the most naturally gifted athlete, but he was the kind of kid who would always give 100 percent. He never gave up.
He would never give up in the classroom, either. Reading was challenging for John, but he continually volunteered, always with a huge smile. He’d slowly sound out words through a paragraph as best he could, and again smiled that big grin when he finished. It was hard for him, but he sincerely wanted to improve and read better.
John had a special outfit he would wear on the day of a dance or other significant event. It consisted of a white shirt, black tie, black pants and highly shined black shoes. I suspected it was his usual Sunday church outfit. He wore the same thing on those special occasions throughout the year, never varying, and it was evidently his only good set of clothes.
John was also very proud of being on the football team. Even though he didn’t play that often, just wearing the football jersey to school gave him a special sense of pride. Hey, that jersey meant he was included—he was an important member of the JV football team!
One picture-perfect fall afternoon, we were traveling along a country road a couple of miles from school on our way to a distant away game. John was sitting with another player right behind me on the bus. At one point, John yelled out, “Hey, coach, there’s my house.”
John was pointing to a clapboard shack surrounded by empty peanut fields. They are very common in Tidewater Virginia. It might have had a bedroom, kitchen and bathroom, but there couldn’t be much more to it. I’m not sure how the family found space for everyone.
The thing was, John was beaming. It may have been an old, wind-wracked house to anyone else, but it was his home. It was the place where his momma and family lived, and however humble, it was home sweet home to John.
That experience was a great reminder—one I’ve always remembered, especially at Thanksgiving. I would bet John’s Thanksgiving was not the same as many of his classmates. Heck, his mom may have gotten one of those Thanksgiving baskets that children collect for in school before the holiday, and some caring teacher discreetly brought over to the family’s home or a parent quietly picked up.
Chances are John brought in something for the basket himself. It probably was a can of something not on the list of requested foods, but it was all there was, and he would have wanted to help. That was the kind of person he was—that was the kind of heart he had.
You may have noticed that poorer people are often the most generous. They know what it means to go without, and they are the first to help others. The Golden Rule is something they take literally.
Anyway, whatever little food John’s family had on their Thanksgiving table would have been enough. Thanksgiving for John and his family was probably not so much about what their house looked like or what was on the table, but who was around the table. When they held hands and said the blessing, it was with loving and generous hearts. They might not have had much, but they were a family, together, and grateful for all that they did have.
There are many families around the New River Valley who will be receiving those Thanksgiving baskets, and there will be others who will enjoy a huge feast with all the trimmings. Many of them have the same thing in common: they will be thankful for all of their blessings and wish the same for others.
Yes, Thanksgiving is a time for food, football, parades and fun, but mainly it is a time for family to gather together and share the love and warmth that unites them (by the way, if you know someone who is alone, invite him or her over or to a church dinner).
Life is about relationships, and we are all connected. Material things may come and go, but love and compassion last. John’s family may not have had much, but in reality, they had more to be thankful for than most people in town—they had each other.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Steve Frey is a writer and CEO of Ascendant Educational Services based in Radford.
