By Steve Frey
It is inspiring when a young person demonstrates good character. It helps to reinforce the reality that young people, in spite of some poor adult examples in our society, are learning the importance of not only knowing the right thing to do but are doing it. Marek Bush is that kind of person.
Marek is a high school student at the center of a story out of a high school near Utica, New York who made national news. He’s a champion wrestler and was in a match earlier this month with Logan Patterson, a fierce rival. Marek trained hard during practice to prepare for the competition and really wanted to win. Unfortunately, he found himself losing on points with only seconds left in the match.
That’s when it happened. Breaking a hold, Logan severely injured his arm, and Marek simply had to stand up and pin him for the win. Logan was virtually helpless with his injured arm, but Marek didn’t want to win that way. He responded by saying he was sorry about Logan’s arm and just sat still. Marek let the last few seconds run out, and Logan won on points.
Why did he do it?
Football coach Vince Lombardi famously once said, “Winning isn’t everything; it is the only thing.” Our society is filled with instances where that seems to be the attitude people value most. For example, it certainly has something to do with the government shutdown. Winning seems to be the only consideration, even with hundreds of thousands of our fellow Americans not receiving paychecks.
Congress has this problem, also. Compromise has become a dirty word, creating gridlock over the years. Even after finding a solution, sides often claim victory and label their opponents losers, which certainly doesn’t encourage cooperation with the next law.
Well, that is not Marek Bush’s way.
Logan later described Marek’s allowing him to win the match in the following manner: “…it was goodness out of his heart. He’s a great person.”
Marek’s father, Bob, fighting through emotion in a television interview, said, “It’s not about winning all the time; it’s about doing what’s right. And he did.”
The crowd watching the match understood what was happening and gave Marek a standing ovation, loudly cheering his selflessness. There were no doubters; there were no questions; there was no disapproval. They just appreciated the goodwill of this high school student.
“I know it makes me look kind of like a weakling,” Marek said.
Others disagreed.
“He’s no weakling, at all,” match referee Terry Kavanaugh said. “I mean, state championships come and go but that —you can’t take that away from a kid.”
No, you can’t.
We have seen other athletes like Marek. The same thing has happened in a variety of sports, but quite often in track. We all know the stories of competitors who could have won but stopped to help someone who collapsed from fatigue or injury. They, too, sacrificed winning to help a fellow competitor.
Marek thought what he did made him look like a weakling, but the truth is, it made him look like a hero—a good-hearted person who cared enough about a fellow human being and a sense of honor that he was willing to sacrifice winning the match.
Sportsmanship is taught to children from a very young age beginning at home. It is actually a combination of several traits. Any coach in the New River Valley will tell you that it is essential to teach student-athletes to do their best. It is important that they give everything they’ve got and “leave it all” on the field, court or mat. Visioning, goal-setting, and effort—they are all crucial. Athletes compete to win.
At the same time, there is something to be said for: “It’s not whether you win or lose; it’s how you play the game.” Demonstrating integrity in observing the rules and competing fairly are also important. Winning modestly and losing honorably are essential traits.
Teaching children these qualities at home, in school, through Radford Rookie Basketball, Christiansburg Tee-Ball and elsewhere creates thoughtful, considerate student-athletes later (and hopefully, adults), who make our society better for everyone. Hearing these messages repeatedly and seeing them demonstrated consistently by adult role models guides children to understand that it is the goal (and fun) to win, but it’s the effort, learning, friendships, sportsmanship and the joy of competition that matter just as much or more.
No, Marek Bush is not a weakling. He is not a loser. By allowing his severely injured opponent the honor of winning under those circumstances, Marek showed more heart and courage than many athletes may ever know. Most of all, he demonstrated compassion and respect for a competitor.
It was a great lesson for us all.
Steve Frey is a writer and CEO of Ascendant Educational Services based in Radford.